You will need:
- Several spells of vertigo
- 5 hours of sleep
- Poor time management (aged 25 years preferable)
- A long journey to Brooklyn
- No Manhattan bound trains
- A full bladder
- A well-meaning cab driver with limited knowledge/understanding of English
- An appointment in an hour
- Construction on the Manhattan bridge
- Several bouts of hysteria mixed with tears (plus more for drizzling later)
- A headache (Optional)
Allow extreme dizziness and lack of sleep to defrost.
Take a lovely day to Boro Park, filled with with charity, rugelach and a Judaica superstore, and add the lack of sleep with the vertigo and the long journey. Mix well.
Carefully add the lack of Manhattan-bound trains to the poor time management. Slowly begin to fill your bladder.
Using less than ideal subway routes, make sure to find a green cab where the driver doesn’t understand how to use GPS. Have your boyfriend help him. Explain that you need to be in Manhattan in 20 minutes, but don’t forget to take the route with the weekend lane closures (later he’ll believe you when you’re weeping)
Continue to fill your bladder and add a pinch of impending doom as you marinate thoughts of missing your appointment with the bridge construction.
Let the hysteria boil over, several times, if desired. Mix well with tears until until you’re running down Jay street looking for a restroom, but unable to speak coherently through hysteria. Careful not to burn yourself on customer-only and out of order facilities. Let a small child figure out how to open the restroom at Burger King.
Sprinkle with a headache in traffic and voila!